Not confident enough to ask something in case one is rejected...
Asking favours/pushing myself forward has never been my strong suit, but inspired by some of Nick Baylis's words, I forced myself to follow up on a recent visit to a museum with a telephone call and offer my services in a voluntary capacity. It is a venue where my background knowledge can certainly come in handy and about which I am sooo enthusiastic.
Happily it may well be that I will become involved in the organisation - musn't count my chickens - but their reaction sounded very positive and on a recent visit there, I bumped into 3 people from my past who it would be a delight to work nearby again!
Okay, so a baby steps only, but Nick and others' thoughts on the ways we hold ourselves back by not venturing in life are already proving useful, especially the idea that even the act of asking/attempting something new etc., can in themselves encourage our self-belief and courage.
I have recognised that like so many others, some of my behavioural traits come from a somewhat childish fear of not being perfect, not wishing to be seen to fail and so on.
My small 'problem' (how dare I utter that word seriously in view of the Bosch-like hell of the poor Haitians) re the un-wanted attentions of someone reared its head ago recently. Fortunately my partner knows about the situation ( we all go to the same gym) and we talk about it which helps, but I find it quite tricky and annoying . It is quite strange that someone cannot see that I am clearly not interested and wish just to be on friendly terms.
And on to Haiti - it is almost unimaginably ghastly and nightmarish over there - made so much worse by the destruction wreaked on the infrastructure. Poor poor souls.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Monday, January 4, 2010
Pursuing well-being. Inspired by Dr Nick Baylis
Happy New Year of course!!
Well into another decade as well as year, so Something has to be done with myself. Yes, it is that time of year where all sorts of resolutions are made, only to be broken a few days/weeks later, but I determined to continue to head in the right direction, albeit little by little. Though I have made strides in clarity of thought, not procrastinating nearly as much and so on, there is much more to be done on this front. I have had the serendipity 2 days ago to have come across a cool book by Dr Nick Baylis who lectures on the skills of well-being at Cambridge University (UK). I am now part of the way through it and am already benefitting! His definition of happiness seems very good to me. Evidently it is not possible nor even desirable to be in a constant state of unquestioning 'happiness' which can frankly be almost bovine, but what I have found useful to think about is Dr Baylis's take on how we can also utilise to positive ends what are considered negative emotions such as feelings of loss, frustration, anger etc. It sounds rather trite and simplistic put like this in my stumbling way, but he does it in far more depth and much more convincingly of course. I have already identified some patterns of behaviour in myself from his writings and genuinely believe that I will be able to make changes and improvements by having done so. I'm not expecting to turn my life around rapidly, but hope that gradually I will come to see myself, my life and what is merely fantasy more clearly. I have, since starting the book, already embarked on a small new project which may or may not succeed, but as I now I recognise that one of my failings is being so keen not to fail, or be seen by others to do so, that I have talked myself out of many things and opportunities which may have led who knows where over the last several years, I have determined to employ a more 'nothing ventured' approach to my whole life. Thank you Nick!!.
Well into another decade as well as year, so Something has to be done with myself. Yes, it is that time of year where all sorts of resolutions are made, only to be broken a few days/weeks later, but I determined to continue to head in the right direction, albeit little by little. Though I have made strides in clarity of thought, not procrastinating nearly as much and so on, there is much more to be done on this front. I have had the serendipity 2 days ago to have come across a cool book by Dr Nick Baylis who lectures on the skills of well-being at Cambridge University (UK). I am now part of the way through it and am already benefitting! His definition of happiness seems very good to me. Evidently it is not possible nor even desirable to be in a constant state of unquestioning 'happiness' which can frankly be almost bovine, but what I have found useful to think about is Dr Baylis's take on how we can also utilise to positive ends what are considered negative emotions such as feelings of loss, frustration, anger etc. It sounds rather trite and simplistic put like this in my stumbling way, but he does it in far more depth and much more convincingly of course. I have already identified some patterns of behaviour in myself from his writings and genuinely believe that I will be able to make changes and improvements by having done so. I'm not expecting to turn my life around rapidly, but hope that gradually I will come to see myself, my life and what is merely fantasy more clearly. I have, since starting the book, already embarked on a small new project which may or may not succeed, but as I now I recognise that one of my failings is being so keen not to fail, or be seen by others to do so, that I have talked myself out of many things and opportunities which may have led who knows where over the last several years, I have determined to employ a more 'nothing ventured' approach to my whole life. Thank you Nick!!.
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